I said goodbye. I said goodbye to a life that I thought I wanted. To a life that I did want. To a life that I worked so hard to get. To make happen. Everything I envisioned, I created. I said goodbye to an amazing place and an adventure for a new life I wanted to create. For a new little actual human life I knew in my heart was on the way. Sometimes we have to say goodbye to what we thought we wanted. To what we needed. To what we needed in order to get to where we are now. S

I posted this exact pic on my vision board. . And then I saw it come to life. Probably about three years ago, after we lost our first pregnancy. It seemed too good to be true. I was just about to turn 35, we were celebrating our ONE year wedding anniversary in a few months and we got pregnant on vacation ! . . Then you hear the words “sorry there is no heartbeat”. And your heart breaks. It breaks over and over and over again with every passing month. Every month with a negati

Yes, I actually wrote that title... it's not the one that came with the template. Been thinking a lot lately about WHY - and the why things happen. I've done a lot of "why me's" in my lifetime. And a lot of those were recent in the last few years. Dealing with #infertility there were a lot of "why the fuck is this happening to ME!"'s. And in times like these no one wants to hear "Everything happens for a reason". PAHlease. When you are hurting, and grieving and sad and dealin